When a Player Character (and sometimes the player) gets Laid

 

In my experience over the decades, all the way back to my teens, one thing seems a constant. Most male players running a male character (or even a female character run by a male in some cases) find it important for their character to get sex. Sure, they can be a Conan type and just throw some coins and gems at a strumpet and go to town. But it seems like kind of a big deal. Sometimes as important to the player as them getting laid personally. I don't know if it has anything to do with lots of D&D dudes traditionally being "incel," though a decent number of D&D wonks of my generation have had marriages and children and all that (personally I'm a long-avowed hedonist; I have two older brothers who had kids and that didn't always look like fun to me). 

An example here, one I experienced for almost 10 years. The host of my last group in my hometown up to around 4 years ago, ran a bard in a long campaign of mine where I used the great Night Below module, and beyond. These characters were played long enough to hit higher level, which is rare for me. So here is this bard character, with a name that should be emblazoned in my mind but I just cannot remember (my brain is pretty good at healing from trauma. Or maybe its just early onset dementia) the name. Anyway "horny bard" was constantly on the make. The player put a lot of his focus on the character getting nookie. And what can you do? If a character is flashy and has a good charisma, you have to let the chances be there. Well, I guess you don't. But I run a game that I like to consider heavy on the emergent (love that word), and where possibilities are open. So I let the dice with modifiers be my guide. 

But whatever it is, I didn't always like it. I had to be "OK, look dude, we don't need to go into more than the basic description of what is happening. I'm not the actual NPC girl, you dig?" It was all in good fun, with a nice dash of "whatevs," but honestly as time wore on in this campaign, I felt like a pimp for this player character. 

But that really isn't often the case. Besides the aforementioned Conan style whoring, if you run a game where you allow role-play to pan out a bit, relationships happen. Maybe between a PC and an NPC, and maybe a bit more rarely (in my game anyway) a couple of characters hook up. It can go to extremes. Such as any girlfriend I have playing in my games from my late teens to my early 20's. If one of my NPC's hooked up with one of a GF's characters, well, that is a bit more in the way of intimate possibilities. I mean, a bit of role-play happening at night when the game is over and everybody is gone is something I experienced a bit of, and I'm sure I'm not alone there. And when I was around 20 something there was about as an extreme example as you are going to get. 

I had two gaming friends who had started college at UCLA. So we had a game at their large dorm apartment. Them, me, and another friend of mine. And my GF at the time I think. We all knew each other from the year or so before at Santa Monica College and all of us had played together many times. All except this other girl present I didn't know. She was a super cutey, and she wanted to play. A couple hours into the game, it was clear she was flirting hard with my non-UCLA buddy "K," and he was responding to it. This girl was staying with the two UCLA guys. She was a student there, but something happened where she got tossed out of her place, and they were letting her stay a few days. They made it clear why they were doing that to me a day or two later when I asked about their behavior. They wanted a shot at her. Keep in mind these were some pretty nerdly dudes. Like Revenge of the Nerds level, more or less. But even at that age I found it kind of shitty that they were letting a gal stay there in hopes of hitting it. It was a different time.

Honestly, they didn't look much different than this. 

Anway, the flirting was going on in character, and it evolved into the real deal. K and the hottie adjourned upstairs to the spare room before the game was even over. I was loving it, but my other pals weren't feeling it. Though I was over the moon. Me and my pal K had a song from the great film Twins we sang to the other when we were making time with a gal:

Jealousy is a powerful emotion. An old man on a barstool (where I got all my best young advice) once told me "Jealousy is like being seasick. You think you are dying and everybody else is laughing."

One of the guys went upstairs and weirdly put a lit candle in front of the door. Maybe a Catholic curse? But it soon escalated to the door getting kicked in and the loving was broken up. It was for sure a ridiculous situation, but I guess it shows an extreme case of what I am talking about. It coming into real life. But boy oh boy, how often has something like this happened. For me, at the time, I was all like "I must be the greatest DM of all time." But of course, if that was true, I'd have been the one upstairs bringing sexy back. 

FYI I was only friends with the UCLA nerds another year or so, while King K is a bestie to this very day. 

But OK, why am I posting about this? Well, in this last Wed night session, some sexy got brought back. Uh, in game, not in real life. Now that I have retired from face to face to do Roll20, the odds of hookups are a bit light.

The fight with goblins was over from the previous game, and all that was left was to pick up the pieces and head back to town. The player of the Shadow Elf ranger was hit with Covid, so he was out. As I think I mentioned in a previous post, he was kind of a murderous mind about killing Relanis and Demul, a couple of ladies who had more or less "Stanned" (stalked) the party since game one. Though all the characters were suspicious (Especially Callie, the cookie making village girl, who seemed to be in large part the focus of the "Odd Couple's" attentions). But even though they had recruited the characters to explore some nearby caves with them, Mr. Shadow Elf ranger seemed to be close to drawing his blade to slay them, especially the albino dwarf Demul, who had the ability to raise dead with a flute and seemed obsessed with doing it whenever possible (Shadow Elf has a hatred for undead, and thus a hatred for her). 

You would think this was right 
up a Shadow Elf's alley.

But he had to miss the game, so the Odd Couple were not in much danger really. But when returning to town I had Relanis be afraid that Shadow Elf was lurking around waiting to kill them. So she used her most powerful weapon to gain a guard for the night. She asked Zip the young fighter (who grew up with Callie in a small village) to walk her to her room. How could he resist? And how could he resist her slow seduction in the boarding house room when she had him take off his shirt so she could use a washcloth to get some goblin blood and mud off him? Though disfigured and partially crippled from a childhood fire and wearing a mask, she was quite lovely and rocked a 17 charisma (and a bard who cast inspiration on him in the caves). In a previous game she had bought him dinner, and they got to know each other. He was the only character who didn't distrust her. Blind, stinking, simple, ding dong, doo dah naivety. And she was a several years older, university educated woman from the big city. 

Having half your face burned
off makes you no less sexy.

Here's M, the Callie players, recap of this last session:

"The group finally leaves the goblin caves, Ton’Rial parts ways and the rest go back to town without him. Halfway back Relanis begs Zip to walk her home, just him… The three others watch as Zip walks with her back to the place they’re staying, goes upstairs and they watch as the lights come on and go out and still no Zip… They go back to camp leaving Zip to spend the night. Callie mentions she’ll be back in the morning unless Zip comes back to camp. The group (minus Zip) goes back to the caravan and has a long rest. Welcome to lvl 3 The next day is a holiday. The Great Autumn Hunt, Callie doesn’t care, she gets up and marches into town to fetch Zip. She has a conversation with Demul briefly before being let into the building. Callie retrieves Zip and goes back to the Caravan. Once we are back, we begin to work, once work is done, we are offered an opportunity to help Howard the Wine Merchant. (Probably not his real name, but has forgotten it.) He wants us to go on an escort mission. We will go with him to a deserted town to pick up some wine he wants. "

Anyway, it was hilarious. Zip was upstairs losing his virginity, while all the others hid in hedges across the street wondering if he was being murdered or something. It was like something from a Porky's movie. 

Callie stews. Her best friend is with what could be a horrible foe of theirs, but she is powerless about what her bestie was up there doing. The next morning, she threw her chainmail shirt over her bodice and marched to the boarding house and fetches her grinning and dehydrated childhood friend away from the witchy woman. 

This was amazingly the first session I've run in many years where there was no combat. Sure, we played about a half hour less than usual, but shit. It just flew by for me. This is as good as role-play gets without becoming community theater. Poor "T," her older, no nonsense female dwarf fighter has no skin in the doings of these young fools but had to crouch in the bushes with the others while Zip was getting his groove on. 

As his virginity was taken, I gave Zip a nice bardic inspiration to use within 48 hours, while he walked around with a goofy smile and his legs shaking. With the Tonrial Shadow Elf probably back next game, odds are Relanis will be looking for another night safe in the arms of the strong and handsome Zip. Or maybe the halfling druid Tealeaf?

Mmm...naw.

This strange and character development heavy game was really great IMO. And I loved doing my part in making a good and decent PC happy. And I didn't even have to feel like a pimp doing it. YMMV.

Cheers

Campaign Gaming and "Plot B"

 "Plot B" is a concept in media, but mostly pops up in Sitcoms. Like almost every sitcom episode ever made since the 50's.

Usually in the case of sitcoms, it's a means to fill things out if the main storyline won't fill up the slot. Most if not all episodes of Seinfeld leaned heavily into it. Some even have C plots. Like the "Festivus" episode that had a side story with Kramer protesting his old bagel shop, and also one with Elaine trying to get a free sub sandwich. And for god's sake, there was D plot - Jerry's "two face" girlfriend. Whew, that's a lot of subplots. 

The Simpsons pointed this trope our back in the day, where Lisa is given a long vision of her family years into the future. When she asks the shaman "why did my vision include a plot where Homer was looking for buried treasure?", the magic man replies "I guess the spirits thought the main plot was a little light."

So anyway, I try to get these little subplots going in a campaign. Always have, though in the past I didn't have to think about it so much. I ran a lot of city campaigns back in the day and was winging it like crazy like you often have to do in a city setting. PC's often going off to do their own thing, and maybe 10-15 minutes having do be devoted to their activities. But at least these days I have a phrase for it. We do live in a time when we have to label everything, right? 

So your main "plot" might be the characters going to Keep on The Borderlands. It could be a full railroad "go to the keep, get rooms at the inn, hear some rumors, go to the Caves of Chaos, fight some shit. Take the treasure. How many experience points do we get. 

Fuck no. That shit needs padded out. When I ran this module last, I set up the Castellan of the keep (and named him and everybody because they didn't bother to come up with names in the original material), his seconds, the NPC's running the inn, and some interesting NPC's to fill out the market area. Enough personalities with some color to help them stand out so they can get interacted with. A prostitute, a pick pocket urchin, a handsome ranger of whatever sex. Anything to fill the dead air. If I recall in the material the only major NPC within the keep is the evil cleric who wants to be besties. That just ain't enough. Now, not all your NPC's will get interacted with. But the point is to have a wealth of them and see what might stick. 

In my last couple of posts I talked about a couple of potential antagonist NPC's who ended up piquing the interest of members of the party. But initially I packed this campaign with interesting NPC's. Most of them being part of the high-end merchant caravan the PC's would be a part of. 

There was Marge, the boisterous seasoned caravan master and boss of the outfit. 

The merchants themselves were all from the big city of Tanmoor and selling all high end, expensive wares. 

Like Lacy the clothes seller. Or Bradly the Bookseller. Or Waldorf the Wine Seller. Several NPC's whom the characters can assist along the way and get to know if they so choose. Callie, the lovely paladin and secret Aasimar, was roped into a fashion show by Lacy for a local Counts daughter to see:

Callie, the glue that holds the party together. 

Lacy kept slapping big city outfits, makeup, and wigs on Callie and rushing her out to be ogled. And it was a hoot. One of my players who had singing experience started singing "Girls just Wanna have Fun" as I revealed each image:

It was just one of the many side bits that came out of having a variety of NPC's around. Like in that particular session, this little fashion show was Plot B. And all the characters participated in a way, that is, they got to see a party member, a shy seeming, cookie baking village girl, in a different light. It was a little thing that IMO had a bit of an impact. 

Injecting things that can promote "Plot B" type things is very effective if you have players who are into role playing at all. And I'm not talking community theater here. But many players enjoy a world where lots of things can happen outside of the railroady main quest. Especially with the advent of video game RPG's, such as Skyrim where you seem to do endless side quests. 

But just making side plots possible is part and parcel of emergent gameplay. YMMV.

Man, I can't get enough of that word. "Emergent." Just rolls off the tongue. 

Cheers. 

NPC's because Reasons

 Including NPC's in campaigns has always kind of been my jam. Because one of my main joys I get out of running games is watching PC's interact with my setting, NPC's need to be a part of that backdrop. 

They are usually created and injected into the games with particular purpose. And I'm not talking about generic shopkeeps and villagers. Its NPC's that stand out in one way or another. In many games over the decades I would have an NPC be part of the party. Either out of necessity (no cleric, not enough fighter types, etc) to fill a niche, or because I thought they might lend themselves to emergent game play. In the case of the party member, they were there to pad things out. But in other cases it was usually just a nice sprinkling of personalities that would be around for PC's to interact with as they wish. Sometimes they are briefly delt with and fall to the wayside as characters move on. But there are times that the NPC might get swept up into the ongoing doings of the characters. That's where things get all emergent. There have been times when an NPC I thought would just be minor gets involved one way or another with a PC, and in many cases have had major effect on the emerging story that is the campaign and stuck around forever. In a couple of cases relationships were born and marriages eventually happened. 

In the early days of the OSR I remember visiting one daft neckbeard forum or another where I would see arguements, people actually getting heated, over whether DM's should have NPC's around other than as cardboard backdrops. "DM NPC" was a dirty phrase. How dare the DM inject some precious NPC into the doings of the characters, taking away their god given time in the spotlight. Yeesh. I certainly never saw it that way. No matter how cool an NPC seems, they are ultimately there in service to the PC's tale. Patrons, royalty, mentors, apprentices. They can play an important part in the emergent play. 

OK, so in my current main campaign on Roll20, I introduced a couple of NPC's in the first session. They actually did not interact much with the party, other than a smiling glance across a tavern room. The party did not know it yet, but they had a keen interest in at least a couple of the characters, and would follow them, mostly at a distance, over the course of several sessions. Stalkers really. 

Relanis

Demul. 

I did not exactly come up with these two, the "odd couple" as the party calls them. Their inclusion is sort of an inside joke with myself. I have done these little inside jokes most of my DMing life. Here is how this one started.

After a successful 12 or so session initial campaign on Roll20, I wanted more. And I strived to find that perfect little group to run for. At the same time, thanks to adopting 5th edition, I had a couple of face to face groups over the last couple years or so. But another satisfying campaign on Roll20 was elusive. I had a couple of session zeros. 

For one I was in contact with this artist, a transgender woman, who had a couple of guys she knew from other games, and along with my long-time player "T" we tried a session out. I kind of knew it was going to be trouble from the get go. This lady, "J," was into playing characters that ran around barefoot with their breasts out. And I mean, ALL her characters were like this. So she wanted settings where that was normal. Well, my setting was not that. But I kind of hand-waved it. One of her guys, a Texan, had a normal name, but insisted on being referrred to IRL as "Morpheus." I found that kind of ackward. Nicknames are great, most of my friends call me "Mac," but Morpheus? I found it kind of lame. 

Then we get into the session and things move along for a bit. Then some combat with an Ankheg goes down. The non-Morpheus guy, who supposedly had some experience, suddenly was clueless. Like "move up to 5 squares and attack if you like" was over his head. No amount of coaching could get him to act. For 20 minutes I was like "just move up to it and roll a die." It was ridiculous. Then I skipped him and it was Morpheus turn. He had a bard character and gave a 5-minute dialogue at the start of the game about his background. Well, it was his turn and he declared "I don't have a character sheet done up." Um, what? You had this elaborate story. You have D&D experience. How could you not have a 1st level character prepared? I didn't even say that out loud; as usual in a difficult moment in a game I try to push past it and wing it as best as I can. "T" would later tell me that she turned off her mike for a few minutes because she was cussing out loud in frustration at these idiots. Meanwhile "J" was still worried about having her tits visible. 

We got through the session, but that was enough for me. "Morpheus" actually had the nerve to lecture me in an email about proper running of a game (me with over 40 years of successful campaign experience and waiting lists for my games based on local word of mouth alone). Yes, the guy who didn't even show up with a character prepared lectured me. Disappointing. I apologized to "T" and told her I would vet a little better next time. 

And I did. A couple of months later I heard from a couple of "gals" through the Roll20 forums. Both had some gender pronouns I would have to be aware of; them/they or her/har or whatever the fuck. I didn't care. I'll run for anybody, though the Roll20 forums seemed to be suddenly awash in "game must be LGTB- ABC" or whatever friendly. Fine. My best friend when I moved from LA was my transgender neighbor, and she was the first person to call and see how I was doing when I got into my new town. I'm hip. Let's just have a game, and I apologize in advance if I use the wrong pronoun/verb/person place or thing verbiage. They had very little experience with D&D and wanted to learn. Great, I love noobs. 

We had two sessions and I thought they went great. They seemed real into it. They had two characters, bards. Here are the images they provided:

 

Look familiar? Yes, these or the NPC's 
involved in the current campaign.

 

I did not invite T to the first or even second session. Before I took up her time I wanted to be sure this might last. So I ran two sort of learning games for the ladies. It went well. So for the third session T entered the game, and the set up was there for them to join the merchant caravan that would be the first half of the campaign. 

I sent a message right after the game saying it was fun and they did great. The reply a couple minutes later was "it was fun, you run a good game. But we need to admit we just wanted a couple of games to learn how to do it so we could run for each other. Thanks. "

Fuck. OK, they were fun little sessions, but it was a lot of work to hand hold noobs during them. I wanted a campaign. Disappointing, and I felt I wasted T's time with these two attempts at getting something going. 

I said "screw Roll20" and ended up running for a second face to face group in town. It went well for several sessions, but then the hosts having a family illness nixed that. And I was sort of getting fed up with going to a house and running in person. After a bit, I decided to try Roll20 again. Long story short, I met this great gal "M" in the forum who is very skilled with 5th ed and Roll20 and has been a bit of a mentor for me. Found a few more players, and the campaign is now going into session 7. It's the best group I have had since the 90's. Great role players with interesting characters. 

And here's where Relanis and Demul come in. 

As I said before, I love to do inside jokes with myself in games. Spoofing myself, my settings, and various pop culture things. Fitting in The Godfather references ("take the crossbow, leave the mince pie") or modern music nods. 

So the inside joke here was I would not let the last attempt at campaign be a total waste. I would use elements from it. Relanis and Demul had a game with T's dwarf and said they would work the caravan. So in large part for T's dwarf's sake, I would not retcon that last session. It happened for T's dwarf, and Relanis and Demul would now become NPC's for me to use. As they almost joined the caravan, they would be lurking around watching the other characters who did take the job. And with some changes I could make them possible antagonists of some kind or another. I mean, they were sort of offbeat characters. I would make them offbeat NPC's. 

Changes were in order. Both characters were good aligned bards before. First thing was I would change them to neutrality on the darker side. Relanis was a Scourge Aasimar bard. I would keep her a bard, but make her a "Broken Aasimar" (see my last post for more details). Demul would be changed to a rogue (though still a musician), with the ability to create undead with a flute. And based on her image provided she would make a perfect "Voor" dwarf (also see last post). They would follow the party throughout the campaign, Relanis having an interest in Callie the (unknown to the party and Callie herself) Protector Aasimar based on a hunch, and Demul causing problems here and there with her addiction to creating undead. 

I had another inside joke throughback to the original games with the LGTB girls. The Inn map I used had a stuffed bear in a corner of it. In the game last year the Demul player talked to the bartender and insisted on hearing an interesting story about why the bear is there. "Uh, its a stuffed bear. Somebody killed a bear and stuffed it. It came with the place." She was insistent. Give me a damn story about the bear. I did not have one to give, and we wasted like 5 minutes on this. 

So for the first session in an inn with these new characters, I used the same inn and same map. The one with the stuffed bear.  I was obsessed with incorporating that bear in this first session. You want a fucking story about the bear? I'll create a great story around it. This is when during pre-campaign prep I decided to give one of the girls the ability to bring a corpse to live. Even if it was just fur and wood framing. I would use that fucking bear. And I did. It came to life and was the first combat of the campaign. That's often how concepts to include in a campaign come to me. "Wouldn't it be cool if..."  Now that ability to create skeletons or whatever became a major part of the campaign and part of what the characters are dealing with. 

You can read my last post for more details and how I have used Relanis and Demul, but the point here is I wanted to get some use out of a previous failed attempt at a campaign, and I did. I found it satisfying. 

I suppose a case could be made that I should not use their ideas. But screw 'em. They will never know. I don't get the impression this was their original artwork. And it's not like I'm making money on any of this. But using those concepts for my own sinister purposes is not just satisfying in a closure sort of way, but what the heck. It's my world and I can use anything that came before. And it certainly is not the first time I tapped into characters of previous players who I'll likely never run for again. 

And I doubt it will be the last. YMMV, as the grogs like to say. 

Cheers. 

Two New subclasses - The Voor dwarf, and The Broken Aasimar

 

In my latest campaign (run weekly on Roll20), I introduced two NPC's. One is an albino dwarf long known in my game world as a "Voor," and the other a 5th edition specific race known as Aasimar. In this case, a sub-class I created of Fallen type I'm calling a "Broken Aasimar."

OK, first the Voor. Its less complex than the other and is actually a dwarf race that I came up with for my setting around 30 years ago or so. 

I honestly don't remember the specifics of introducing them into my world. I just remember a party from the city visiting a lone mountain sitting 3 or so days north. Once a small kingdom of friendly dwarves, some time centuries past a strange gas was released by mining there that engulfed the dwarves of Voor mountain and mutated them. They were bleached albino, and their bodies became a bit more emaciated in contrast to the usual stout dwarvish form. They lost passion for most things that bring joy to dwarves, and in fact lost a sense of emotion. Not becoming truly evil, just kind of sociopathic. 

I don't really recall why I didn't use Duegar or any number of fallen dwarvish races that came along with the Fiend Folio and Monster Manual 2. For whatever reason I did not delve into these alternate dwarf races until decades later. 

The Voor NPC in my current campaign, part of a duo the characters have come to call "The Odd Couple," is a young girl named "Demul." 

Demul and her friend Relanis are travelling musicians. But in Demul's case not a bard, but in actuality a Rogue. So far I have enjoyed her being underestimated. Quiet and always following Relanis lead, Demul discovered she had a strange power prior to the campaign while practicing playing a flute. When she plays a sinister tune on it (I've been humming the old Dark Shadows theme when she does it), a certain amount of undead come to unlife and begin attacking whatever living things are nearby. So far she has no control over them. Indeed, she seems to have a certain lack of control about using her power in general. She is obsessed with this ability, and dead things in general. And because, for certain reasons, the "Odd Couple" is following the party at a safe distance, Demul has brought dead things to life that the party has had to deal with. In the first session at an inn in town there was a stuffed bear in the bar. From a dark corner Demul player her tune, and the stuffed bear was the first fight of the campaign for the group. 

In the second game the party fought a troll on the road, eventually burning him up in fire. From the treeline, Demul played her tune and hey presto, the party were fighting a zombie troll. 

Her travelling partner, and mentor, is the 26 year old bard Relanis. Dressed very straight laced, and wearing half a face mask and walking with a cane due to childhood injuries, Relanis is secretly a "Broken Aasimar." One that became "fallen" due to her transformation happening during severe childhood injury.

Strait-laced townie Relanis

Hair down, out in the field 
travelling Relanis

A traditional Fallen Aasimar is an Aasimar that experienced some kind of emotional trauma that caused their Aasimar form to take on a more demonic appearance. Especially so in the case of a Broken Aasimar. Perhaps a bit cruelly, the Aasimar form of a Broken has no such injuries or disfigurement. 

Relanis' Broken Aasimar form

So Relanis and Demul follow the party around, slowly gaining suspicion. It actually took the party awhile to realize that they were responsible for the dead coming back to life after they killed it. And also that Relanis has an obsession with the Paladin (also secretly a Protector Aasimar) Callie, a lovely unassuming, cookie baking village girl who doesn't even seem like a paladin (she often uses a rolling pin in battle).

I think all the male characters are
around because of Callie.

One of the traits of my Broken Aasimar class is that they are in large part driven by nightmares as well as dreams, and also have a minor sense that somebody might be an Aasimar of some kind themselves.  Though in Relanis' case the nightmares tend to be about her childhood injuries, caused by her house burning down with her in it. But as soon as she saw Callie in the first game, she sensed something, that she may be Aasimar as well. Hence, she and Demul follow the party, usually at a distance, because Relanis wants to be around when Callie makes "The Change." 

This caused all sorts of suspicion, right up to this last session where Relanis asked the party to come along on a short adventure nearby ("we are musicians, not fighters"). In the goblin caves things started coming to a head. While Callie is a bit freaked out by "the Odd Couple's" attentions, its the parties grimdark Shadow Elf that treats them like crap, and since he hates undead, he has come close to drawing down on them when he learned Demul is responsible for all the foes coming back after a fight. There was a lot of tension in this session, especially after Relanis and Demul (hanging in the back) were ambushed by goblins and Relanis made the change to her Aasimar form. Relanis broke into sobs after changing back (the Aasimar form is not disabled and has no face burns, and Relanis wishes she could stay in that form), and instead of sympathy, the Shadow Elf still wanted to kill them. But the fighter Zip, who grew up in a small village with Callie, has a certain fondness for Relanis after she bought him a tavern dinner in a previous session. 

The inclusion of these two unique NPC's in the campaign has paid off as a nice side-interest thing, and I so look forward to where it is going. The party just turned 3rd level, so Callie should make and Aasimar transformation before too long. It will be Suprise for her seeing as the player has her clueless about that celestial blood, and maybe at that point she will understand why Relanis has such interest in her.  The party is none the wiser about her secret race. And my misdirection of having Relanis show a morbid interest in the Shadow Elf ranger has helped them remain clueless. I was a bit worried originally that I might blow it for Mary, the Callie player, by drawing all that attention then her stalker turning out to be an Aasimar. But it remains secret. 

I think I will make a quick post on the origins of "The Odd Couple" in this campaign. I actually have specific reason for why I included them. But for now, it's just fun to get some experience with Aasimir in my games, and to finally after all these years get to touch upon the Voor dwarf race with the inclusion of Demul. 

Sirens: Battle of the Bards (the rise and fall?)

 

A few days after the whole elf ear cosplayer Satine Phoenix and gym freak Jamison Stone (together maybe call them "Satine Flexnix?") thing blew up, my fascination slowly wanes. After watching a couple hours of this Foster guy's (a dude who did an after show for Critical Role or something) stream where he interview the people who paid Satine and Stone something like 20 grand to hype their cyber security company at Pax I was a little bit spent. But it was kind of gripping. This guy and gal staked heir future with the company they pitched this idea too, and ended up having to play personal assistant to the two knuckleheads. Carrying extra bags with their shit, fetching coffee..

 ...being lectured on professionalism, and even being criticized for their body types and relationships, all the while Satine and Stone did everything to further their bank accounts and fame while ignoring what they were getting paid for. A lot of it on camera. Big pimpin, yo..

There are a ton of other stories of course. All the unpaid or underpaid contractors who were stiffed and insulted. And I'm guessing there will indeed be more to come. I would not at all be surprised that sexual impropriety will come up at some point. 

Who could resist? But if you plan on
getting physical, I recommend bringing
 along some pain thinner. And don't tug 
on Stone's bicep strings. If they come off
his arms start to deflate. 

Satine, a former porn star, got her small pond fame started as part of the Zak Smith porney chick crew, doing the live play I Hit it with My Axe and other projects. When the Zak controversy hit, she turned her back on him about as fast as she threw her hubby Jamison Stone unto the train tracks. So a nice history of doing a Judas number on skeevy (IMO), abusive (allegedly) dudes she formerly defended the bad behavior of.

Back in her porn days she often was
 drowning in something other than D20's

Jamison Stone, well, I dunno his background. Rich family. Propensity to martial arts and cult memberships. How these two hooked up I have no info about. But there seemed to be some kind of road to a new cult going on:

Though its presumptuous to assume his 
modern Pharoah look points to cult leader

So yeah, its likely a lot more will come. I'm guessing there will be more throwing under the bus by Satine of her weirdo hubby. And maybe he will have some accusations of his own. 

But during this little lull in the pain and shame, I've been checking out their latest project. 

This Kickstarter reached like 300,000. There were tiers of upwards of 3 grand, where stretch goals included things like going to Colorado to play D&D at their house for 6 hours. When the time is up I kind of imagine a trap door opening under your chair and you shooting down into a tube system that pops you up at the local airport.  You can get your character fleshed out with artwork, and a short adventure about them. Gee, that sounds like its worth 3 grand. 

But all kidding aside, outside of the overflashy art and Satine's heavily made-up mug being all over the stuff, the actual setting sounds interesting. If not a bit over the top. The setting focus' on the city of Sativa or some such, a magical tiered city chock full of colorful bards type. They came up with 20 new bard sub-classes, I guess so the entire setting doesn't reek of same-same. Though I'm not sure how far you can pull the taffy to get over 20 distinct bard varieties. This is what I am the most curious about. 

But a bard war (or whatever) sounds like an interesting concept. 

The setting itself seems kind of Sci Fi to me. The city would for sure not fit into my setting. 

And some imagery suggests a more modern setting, such as the one with a saxophone player. The listing of locations in the city includes "comedy clubs." Zuh?

Yeah, I...huh?

But OK, sure. Maybe high fantasy these days is all about the higher, less restrictive concepts. Fantasy world with a sax? What the hell. There are worse things going on in D&D games. 

If I was a player I would 
totally run Twinkle Riot. 

For this game you are probably going to have most of your players running bards. But can they be different enough to not seem odd? I guess they could. I once ran a 1st ed. thieves guild thing were besides a plain theif you could do a thief fighter, thief MU, thief cleric, or whatever, and it worked well. Those kinds of campaigns are common, so I guess this is maybe a modern extension of that. 

On top of it all, I guess you get a god like character based off of flexi Jamison himself..

Yeah, nothing speaks to cult
leader aspirations here..

After seeing her make-up and rubber elf ear-free apology, despite what seems like some Amber Heard level acting, I feel bad for her. The tears weren't copious, but there was about a gallon of snot. With no tissues making an appearance. Just finger wiping. She should have at least removed the nose ring, but for all I know its keeping the plastic surgery together. But seriously, I can't help but feel bad. She was living high on the hog in the small gaming space. She may have been bound for bigger things. But in this day and age of social media, its just best to come off as a great person. To treat people as well as you can. Overwhelm them with kindness. That seemed to be the surface, but so much is coming out it just seems she was a a huge ego that kept growing bigger. Losing wisdom with age instead of gaining it. It really is in the end a tragic tale. 

Anyway as for Battle of the Bards, I'm honestly thinking of yoinking some of these concepts, on a smaller scale less filled with hubris. I've long wanted to do a thieves guild thing again, but a bards guild campaign might be a fun twist.

You gotta wonder what will happen with this project. Just like Zak Smith's 4 year late Demon City Kickstarter, the comments pages are full to the brim with negative comments and refund requests, though I'm sure there is plenty of Simp support in there. I didn't read very far. 

But as for Satine and Jamison Stone, I sort of hope the whole peacock cosplay D&D player thing is close to an end. I'm not a fuddy old neckbeard, but I kind of prefer the more down to earth classic players of old. YMMV.

This was a D&D stud when I was a kid.

D&D and the Rise (and fall?) of the Beautiful People

OK, it may be more truthful to call them "Peacocks." 

But whatever it is, behind my back, a bunch of D&D players have become D&D celebrities. High profile, entourage-towing, "hey look at me" types. Back in my early gaming life the most beautiful D&D player I knew was my high school sweetheart. Me and my friends were lucky enough that our gals were into pop culture things, and D&D was not off the table. All the other groups we knew in those days were sausage fests. Tables full of long hairs in heavy metal band T shirt bands, or young George Costanza's. That's not to say we had it better than anybody else (or maybe we did). But it's always nice to have fun in a mixed group. You know, like a beer commercial. And whether I had a GF involved or not, into the 2000's I was always able to get a decently mixed gender gaming group. 

I guess it was D&D with Porn Stars where a bunch of women gaming came to the fore. Not that I was aware of everything going on in the OSR. I read a few blogs, did my own little blog, made some friends, got in some beefs, then got into other things. When it came to D&D I decided to just focus on running. I've been mostly out of the loop for years now. But I decided to write a little bit in current times when somebody told me a blog is a great place to write for yourself. And that is what I am doing. But my gaming life has gone through changes, and I feel like there are some personal tales to tell. And let's face it, pop culture nerds like to talk pop culture. Even if hardly anybody is listening. But jeez, looking deeper into the game culture scene makes me wish I hadn't sometimes. But trainwrecks are hard to look away from. 

That wasn't so for Zak Smith and his blog some years ago. It was gaming with a whiff of dirty sex; porn girls playing D&D How was that NOT a win? It was popular as hell. Maybe in part from Zaks writing, maybe in part from the presence of the gals. 

Zak and company during much, much, much,
much, much, much more happier times.

 I can't speak on the talent of Smith. To me a lot of what the "edgelords" were doing did not seem much more clever than what those heavy metal dudes in high school were doing. Poop and cocks and unbeatable scenarios. But whatever. When I stopped blogging I paid little attention. When I turned my back on the whole OSR scene I guess the biggest controversy was James at Grognardia walking away from his "legendary dungeon" (that had only been invented a couple of years before) Kickstarter. And with nary a word. He did that going out for smokes and never coming back thing He did recently come back, but I could not say to what reception. He still has (reduced) comments in his comment section, and seems to have been invited to a couple of podcasts (that I never heard of). But I've been out of the loop, and still am. 

Though the Zak Smith/Mandy Morbid controversy was a hell of a thing that happened. A broken relationship and some serious allegations, followed by a big time cancellation of the dude. I never knew how popular the guy had been in the gaming scene, although I can say with a fact that anybody I met and gamed with in the last three years in my new town had ever heard of Zak, and most not of the OSR There is money to be made there, but its still a small pond. And most Kickstarters in the scene seem to go to hell. 

But Satine Phoenix? Some knew about her, mostly I guess from the recent rise in streaming popularity. And spending hours watching that shit. Watching other people have fun. 

I knew of her mostly because she was a major personality at a famous comic book shop in my home town. There was a Meetup. For 10 bucks you could come play D&D with a porn "star" and have pancakes. Well, they did not lean into the porn thing, but Satine was also one of Zak Smith's players, and a part of his video projects (not porn, but D&D with porn stars. And oh, I guess there was some porn too). 

More recently Satine is parted from Zak. Right after the allegations she spoke up in support of his accuser, and went on to her own things. She started living a life in rubber elf ears. Going to conventions and trying to gain a high profile. She was a D&D community leader (that seems to give more bragging rights than anything else). She appeared in a Rick and Morty comic. She clearly was on a path of more fame in the usual small pond of D&D. Special guest stuff. 

But that pond got bigger once 5th edition settled in and got more popular, and started skewing younger. And this was the age of streaming. And even I became a fan of some streamers. Such as the Vtube Egirls using motion capture tech to appear as living anime girls on Twitch and Youtube. 

That's what I'm talkin' bout..

Not so much tabletop. Watching others play D&D is about as much fun for me as watching two flies fucking. No matter how much they dress it up. Not the community theater of Critical Role. None of it.

I like watching streamers play video games...especially when they look like this...

Valkyrae. I have fun watching her have fun.

Pokimane. She's from Monaco! Also appeared 
briefly in the movie Free Guy.

 I think I did watch a lot of Foreververse when I moved into my new town and didn't have a full TV channel lineup for a few weeks. Jason Miller and Amy Vorpahl were on that. 

Who are they? I dunno. Outside of that show I didn't know where they were from or what they did. Though in the pic Jason is wearing a shirt from a famous music store in my home town. But they did seem like very cool and casual people on that show. I sort of liked it for that. Everybody seemed like regular folk. Zero vamping. And Jason ran some Basic D&D with In Search of The Unknown and his style was very endearing.  Miller and Vorpahl seemed to have become part of the Satine entourage lately, minor gaming celebs making up a wall of protection around Satine and her colorful husband, Stone Jamison. Maybe they weren't so nice when with these "beautiful people?"

C'mon, he looks like a nice guy. Who would totally
not tell you to get a haircut and lose some weight..

This guy is somebody I only learned about in regard to the Satine controversy. Yep, of course. Another big controversy in a small pond. I guess Satine hooked up with this guy, a tattooed gym rat with heavily gelled rainbow brite hair who seemed to be making a bicep muscle pose in every other photo I see. I mean, I go to the gym and have decent guns, but I'm not always posing them. Or even wearing short sleeve shirts. 

Oh yeah, there's the flex

And apparently every character is..him. Not too douchy a move.

Satine tends to be rendered in lots of art, and she is featured on the Kickstarted art...big time..

So I don't know about their businesses. I was aware of Satine's Destination Fantastique kickstarter that seemed to be a money making dodge as best I can tell. Hey, when you are getting popular you need to milk your simps, right? But was that a sign of less than genuine intent for Satine? Because just in my reading the last couple days, she appears as a person, when the cameras are off, puts a lot of effort into seeming nice and gaining a following to monetize. Her and the Light Brite hubby running D&D in castles and on cruise ships. Nothing wrong with that. But the main point seems to be they were not really nice people, especially if they owed you money. Becoming hostile and belittling when asked for updates on pay, and a shit ton of gaslighting.  In the latest updates Satine seems to be making a play at throwing the husband under the bus to save that brand. She talks of supporting his abusive behavior, though apparently she was not as nice as her smiles or rubber ears would lead you to think. He can go sulk in the bondage room while Satine goes on to the conventions in the ears and tries to get some good will back. And she does have those industry friends. Who will go and who will stay? Jason Miller and Amy Vorpahl were guests at the velvet rope wedding they had a Gencon (though sources say they had already gotten married...but you need that attention, right? Repeat it at a con where you are already treated as a star). 

I dunno. For me it's much ado about nothing. For my life I mean. Its an interesting story, sure. Its why I'm talking about it. Like any of the controversies. But it is a tale about lives being destroyed, for better or worse. I can't say if Zak Smith got what was coming to him. There seems to be a case of an embittered ex. But I don't know these people. Satine and company as well, but multiple complaints seem to be adding up. And this is just a few days old. There is likely to be more to come. I smell cancellations, but maybe Satine and her ears can at least get her out of it. 

(I want to add that Battle of the Bards, though kind of overly flashy, seems kind of cool to me).

I'll just be gaming. Tonight is game night! I don't know how beautiful my players are. I don't use video on Roll20. Well, "T" is a former actress. I know what she looks like. But the others are fairly young. And that skews much better for me than when I did 1st ed in later years.

YMMV. Cheers.