Comic Dork Monday: June Jitsui kicks Spider-Ass

Believe me, this is not a comic book post but a gaming post. But let’s talk comics for a second.

Any older dude who read Comics back in the day probably fondly remembers the old Twinkie advertisements on the inside back cover. Usually, a major superhero like Spider-Man or Superman would for some reason need to use Twinkie snack cakes as a secret weapon to stop some bank robber or other low level street hood. That’s right, Spider-Man can dodge bullets and Supes can spin the earth backwards on it’s axis, but they need fattening snack treats to take down numbnut criminals, costumed or otherwise.

In this particular ad, Spider-Man is on his way home from the deli when he runs into a beautiful but deadly mistress of martial arts. First off, Spidey is a native New Yorker and Twinkies are what he gets at the deli? Huh. Second, why the fuck is he walking home? If he had gone as Peter Parker, would he have swung home? Who the hell is writing this shit, Rob Liefeld? Sheesh.

So while passing through Central Park (wow, Spidey does live dangerously) our hero runs into the formerly unseen by us villainess June Jitsui. Apparently Spidey has a past with her that we are not made privy to. Maybe a jilted booty call from before he met Mary Jane? We’ve really only see Peter Parker get lucky with white chicks. Well, anyway, you know what they say about Asian girls…

Oh my God, this apparently unpowered Chinese chippie proceeds to kick the living shit out of Spidey, who describes her prowess as similar to “running into a truck.” Why can’t this proto-mutant half spider take her on? I mean, he is superfast, agile, has a danger sense, and is strong enough to bend steel girders. And check out the kick in panel 3. What the hell? She obviously just phoned that one in. Looks like the kick a trucker would use to boot the rest stop hooker out of the semi’s cab. He couldn’t block that? Well, for some reason his webbing will not work without the awesome power of sugar and cholesterol, so it’s his bag of Twinkies from Morty’s Deli that saves the day.

June greedily eyes the Twinkies and brashly proclaims to them “I’m going to turn you into poo!” before scarfing them down. Well, ok, that line is actually from Family Guy. I’m trying to be a funnyman here.

OK, here’s the rub. At some point in the late 80’s I used June as a villain character in my Champions games. I shit you not! I needed a crooked sensei to operate a chain of martial arts studios that fronted for criminal enterprises, so I plucked June from this strange advert. I did however make the last name “JItsu” instead of “Jitsui.” C’mon, I have a little respect for my GM’ing rep.

She was around for awhile in the street level games that I ran. One martial arts PC even had her as a bit of an arch enemy. At some point somebody hired this guy’s enemies (including June, some criminal wrestlers, etc.) to attack him one at a time to weaken him. The third attack or so of the day was from June in a busy outdoor shopping mall, who actually bitch-slapped the already weakened PC around much like she did to old Web Head in the ad.

In the 90’s she didn’t really show up in my Champs games, and went back into obscurity.

I recently started doing some street level “Dark Champions” games as an alternative for my group, and for the first game I resurrected June Jitsu. I even still had a mini for her (that actually looked a lot like the comic book June). Thing is, it’s around 20 years later, so I made her a washed up entrepreneur who was down to just one studio in the bad part of town. She still fronts for her students criminal activities, but is a bit worn down. She smokes and drinks a lot now, and though still decent looking in her 40’s she is for sure not on her game as she once was.

After a couple of games the characters have yet to tangle directly with her, but that will happen next game (and who knows when that will happen – this is an alternate when I only have three players at a session). As used up as the dragon lady is, she still has some skill (don’t forget that mighty “trucker kick”) and I’m looking forward to her mixing it up with the PC’s one at a time or as a group. She is good enough still that one on one the PC is very likely to experience the smack down that poor, deli loving Spider-Man did that fateful day in Central Park.

Now go eat a Twinkie!

Addendum: from what I understand, June Jitsui appeared one other time in the 80’s. It was in a mini-series called “Fing Fang Foom,” a great old school Marvel monster character I loved, but never heard of the miniseries. Apparently, June appeared in some kind of Riker’s Island jail break scene (she is such a tough cookie they probably had her in with the dudes making bitches out of all the bikers, skin heads, and Mexican Mafia members).

The Loud Mouthed DM

I've never had a review of my DMing style appear anywhere, and I haven't had a photo taken of my game table since the 80's (I think).

Well, here is a very rare example of both. Bob "Cyclopeatron," who sat in for my Socal Smackdown OD&D session, posted briefly about it and you can check it out over at Cyclo's blog.

This is the first time I have ever been referred to as a "Loud Mouth" in a positive light, and I thank you Bob! Just remember, me drinking makes my voice louder - and you drinking makes my voice sound louder to you!

Cyclopeatron reminded me too that this was an old school session with some historical significance. There were a few guys present who got into D&D in it's ancient past just like I did, and I was glad for their presence. Considering the prominance of board games and miniature battles at this con, it may actually be a bit of a miracle that this session occured at all!

Again, thanks to everyone who was there. I'm really glad that session happened, especially considering my current shakey confidence in my own regular group.

Cheers, guys

Con Man

This weekend I went to the Socal Smackdown con in Anaheim. Yes, I attended a game convention. No, hell did not freeze over.

At the Minicon event a few weeks ago I ran an evening OD&D session, and it was well received by some of the guys. As a matter of fact, Mark (known on Dragonsfoot and other places as “Fred C. Dobbs”) suggested I continue the game at Socal Smackdown, a new convention affiliated with the dudes from Brookhurst Hobbies out in the OC (Orange County). Mark is an original con-attending Southern California gamer as far back as the 70’s, and as he and a couple of the other players were interested in continuing their characters (at Minicon I proclaimed that “I don’t do one-shots” and that I would like to make it possible to continue somehow after that day). Long and short of it is Adam at Brookhurst hooked me up with a Saturday and a Sunday afternoon session at the Hilton. It was icing on the cake because it turns out running a game got you “volunteer” status so I got in free.

The Smackdown was held in the Hilton Hotel on Convention Way right next to Disney. Now when I was a kid going to Disneyland, The Hilton was there, but a lot of the surrounding area was just parking lots and dirt fields. Damn I feel old. Now it is a ton of big hotels and as before a bunch of little crappy ones. Very congested area now as far as buildings. Anyway, the Hilton was a hundred and ten bucks a night and I wanted to go cheapie for two nights, so I grabbed a tiny Super 8 single bed room just down the street for a sweet 57 bucks a night.

It was a cozy little room, with a nice big TV and a large sink area, so I was set up for party time like I tend to do at hotel stays. I had a big cooler chock full of ale and beer, my boombox, and my laptop. I even brought my mountain bike for quick store trips. As a single man in a small room, I of course was in drinking mode. By the time I was set up in the room (even managed a quick swim in the grimy little pool) and ready to go over to the con for my 2PM start time Saturday, I was already about 4 drinks in. With a small plush shoulder cooler I was even further prepared to have a supply of firewater (I mean, why stop at that point, eh?). There was a decent turn out of players besides Mark and some of the other guys, so the dungeon crawl was on and I had a head full of steam. Bob “Cyclopeatron” hit the bar early on and brought me a rum and coke which just added fuel to the fire.

It was a fun session, and the four hours just flew by. So OD&D represented and was large and in charge for awhile there in the RPG area (the poor fella in the table next to us had a pretty poor turn out for his Pathfinder and had to cancel, after setting up a computer and a printer and all kinds of stuff). Nobody really bothered me, which is rare for when I have some strangers in a game. Well, this one older dude rolled his eyes and groaned when I said we are doing 1st level characters, and then he wanted to run one of his existing, high stat characters instead of rolling one up, but it didn’t ruin it for me. Everybody else was a good sport and added to the fun.

Well, I was set to sit in on Mark “Fred C. Dobbs” homebrew fantasy game later that night, so I hit the Super 8 again to wolf down some Subway (BLT) keep the alchohol train rolling, and made it back to the Hilton for the “Argent” session. It was an RPG based on a boardgame Mark had going at one time, so it was a bit different. I did enjoy the session, and created an exceptional barbarian character who was fun to play.

A lot of Sunday afternoon games had little turnout, and mine was no exception. The focus at this con really was boardgame type things. Very niche. So Sunday afternoon Mark and Mat’s characters hired on some henchmen and took a couple of hour wack at the dungeon, even pretty much clearing out the 2nd level. After that they were taking off from the con early, so I wandered around the tables a bit before going back to the hotel. There was a lot of Battlemech (or whatever) and Flames of War and other board games going on. One that was fun to look at was Monsterpocalypse. In it you put down a cityscape complete with buildings, and set up monster action figures to battle army units. It reminded me a lot of the old Rampage video game I loved, but some aspects of it I found too silly. Some of the monsters had stupid clothing, like the giant gorilla with army medals like a general, or a giant Cthulhoid monster with a giant pirate hat on (c’mon, dudes). The guys who were promoting the game were very friendly of course, but as far as any of the folk playing various games I didn’t find many who were all that friendly. I should have actually tried to get in on some gaming (the zombie type games looked fun too), but I ended up going back to the hotel to relax with the intention of dropping by the con late night just to see what was going on .

But hell, I had a big Subway meatball sub I picked up (Subway was the only reasonably priced place around), a six pack in the cooler still, some Jack Daniels, a large screen TV, and my laptop. Not to mention nice air conditioning and a toilet 5 feet away. The lure of a cozy solo party was just too tempting. I hung out watching TV, listening to tunes, and worker on my game stuff until I passed out sometime after midnight. In the morning I packed up and drove back to West LA.

I surely would have spent more time on the con floor trying to get in on games if I had popped for the Hilton, and who knows maybe I’ll get one or two of my regular players to come with me for a couple of days next time. Oh yeah, I’ll do it again. I’d like to do another old school game like Glorantha Runequest or something.

I know, anti-climactic. You were probably expecting a rant here, and given some of my previous posts I don’t blame you. But I actually enjoyed the experience. The con was small, but it was fun to be in on the ground floor of a new event. I don’t really see myself going to any of the big out of town conventions or anything any time soon, but a small event fairly close to home is all right with me. Let’s face it, around 4 years ago I was dying to run some games and was still in my several year temporary game retirement, so I feel fortunate not just to have my own regular group, but to be getting out there a little bit into the game community at large. It is sort of a new Renaissance for my gaming, so I’m going to ride it out as long as I can.

Call of Cthulhu Friday: Boss Cthulhu

Phew! What a week! Work work work. Made it hard to post! Looking forward the the long Labor Day weekend. Actually grabbing me a couple of days worth of Super 8 motel near Disneyland, and running some OD&D sessions at a game convention. I'm hoping it'll get my mind off the grind for a bit. Good old fashioned escapism.

OK, this has nothing to do with Cthulhu, but I hope this funny pic gives you a laugh, especially if you toil in a cubicle for "The Man" like I do. OK, my boss is cooler than Cthulhu, but you know what I mean...

Best part it, he sleeps pretty much every day of the year, so he's not seen much. Cthulhu, not my boss.

Goatees and Black Trench coats

I never put much thought to gamer fashion. At least here in California, it tends to be the same stuff you see anywhere on the streets – t-shirts and jeans or shorts.

Sometime in the late 90’s I noticed a strange fashion trend in gamers. Around 1998 or so I had gone to a handful of GURPS sessions in West LA. This was a rare move for me; for most of the 90’s I had decent sized groups and consider it the heydays of my D&D, Call of Cthulhu, and Champions campaigns. But my group was slowly petering out towards the end of the decade, and a couple of strong players had moved away or got married or whatever. So I will admit that I looked for some local groups to game with and maybe troll for and cull some decent players for my own group. What was I to do? I still wanted a large group, and I didn’t go to cons or hang out at game stores. At the time I had no idea of what was going on in the gaming world outside my circle, besides the occasional trip out to Long Beach to The Warhouse (for some of the reasons I would not set foot in the more local Aero Hobbies of Santa Monica, look at this old experimental post).

So there I was sitting in on sessions of some kind of GURPS games, run by a dude who used no notebook and made it up as he went along. And not in any kind of good way. It was some kind of science fiction thing where all science fiction things existed at the same time. Sounds like a great idea (which I think the dude stole from Nexus Comics, but he denied it), but the execution was pretty poor. You would go out and do something, and he would brainstorm on what to have happen to you. The host of the games thought this GM was “imaginative,” but I did not agree. Over a couple of games my guy would go out jogging or out to a bar, and the only thing the guy could think of was “a predator from the Predator movies is jogging there too,” or “a predator from the Predator movies is on the barstool next to you. “ I guess Predator was on HBO the night before or something.

Ugh. Horrible. But here is the rub, the guy wore a black trench coat. Not bad you say? It’s fucking summer here in So Cal, dude. Really? A black trench on a warm summer night? OK, not that big a deal. Columbine was still a year or two away, and the black trench was yet to be thought of nationwide as the gear of pathetic loser geeks who got picked on and went batshit instead of lifting weights or taking karate or whatever. it struck me as weird. But hey, I’m a lifelong beach dude, so what do I know of trench coats?

I did not last long in that little group. My gaming life with my own group continued on.

Sometime around 2001 or 2002 I went for a couple of hours to the Gateway convention over at LAX to do a little shopping for miniatures or what not. I parked a few blocks away, and I noticed groups of the pretty much all-male convention goers heading back and forth to the Jack in the Box across the street. Of the 20 or 30 guys I saw in that few minutes, 90% of them (I’m not kidding) were wearing black trenches. OK, so I don’t recall what time of year it was, but this is Southern California. In deepest winter it is often 75 degrees. Jeez.

Now, keep in mind this was not all that long after columbine. Granted, Columbine had nothing to do with goatees. The Columbine jack-offs were pretty clean cut and studly compared to the squirrely dorked-out trenchers I saw around that con hotel. And at the time I did notice a lot of goatees in various fandom gatherings in general, especially at Renaissance Faires. So I guess that is neither here nor there (outside of the fact that combined with the coats it made the con dudes look like a bunch of clones).

Not long after Columbine I was partying at the So Cal Ren Faire one night and saw the head of security giving a hard time to a pair of black trench donning teenagers for being so stupid as to adopt the fashion of a pair of losers who shot up their school because they were the only two kids in the school who couldn’t get laid. And those were teens, lots of these con dudes looked well into their 30’s at least. I remember also thinking about the crummy “imaginative” GM from those GURPS games, who attended that same con from what I understood. But at least that douche was doing it without the stigma of the shooting hanging around.

I only had a pass for the shopping area, but from what I could see there was an ocean of these black trenched yobbos at the tables.

I just didn’t get it. Why would you want to wear anything associated with the biggest high school losers in human history? It was mind boggling. Maybe after 10 years or something, but a couple? C’moan. Some of them in addition also seemed to like to wear those fingerless driving gloves with the coats which was just extra weird.

Next week I am going to be in attendance for a couple of days at a So Cal game convention. No shit. That’s right, hell froze over. And this isn’t for lack of my own decent group. I’m actually trying to get out there more in the game community since I blog and all that. I’m getting older, and who knows if this is my last big hurrah for gaming. I’m not sure I can see myself doing this at 50. But of course, I said I wouldn’t be doing it at 40 when I was 30. My, how time flies and we lie to ourselves.

Anyway, I’m looking forward to seeing the latest con going fashions. If it’s just t-shirts and shorts I guess I might secretly be a little disappointed. Hmmm…maybe I’ll drop by the thrift store and see if I can find a trench in my size.

Sandboxy enough for me

Sandbox. It’s a gaming term that many people will have a somewhat different definition for. What is it?

Well, unless you are all about totally “winging it” as a GM, you need to do a lot of prep on a lot of locations when you are thinking sandbox. Have all your ducks in a row, as they say. If you start players in a location, they can hear about and choose from a variety of directions and places to go. Head to the hills up North where rumors of giants with sacks of gold come from, or go to the Western Forest to visit the old abandoned wizard tower the barkeep has told you about. Maybe just head south and explore some wilderness hexes. The GM has something to offer no matter where the players might go.

Is this really sandbox, or are you just creating enough railroad tracks to make it seem like a sandbox (paraphrasing Frank Mentzer, I believe)?

In my teens I took a rare break from my own gameworld to do a few sessions of City State of the Invincible Overlord. The players made up characters, and I had them be non-natives showing up at the city gates. From there, they were free to go where they wanted. Go into that tavern and look for action? Sure. Go into the bath house and talk to the dolphin that just appeared in a pool? Whatever. Go down in the sewers to investigate rumors of a Wraith Overlord? Fine by me. It was a lot of fun, but lets face it – every one of those locations the player visited where set encounters with their own preset plot hooks and rumors and such. Was that true sandbox because the players decided which stores to go to first? I dunno.

I guess it is still something to taste that is very debatable. What do I think of trying to sandbox? Well, as a kid things seemed more freeform. But as adulthood started I was doing more plot driven things. I would not say railroady, because I have always thought the character freewill was important to the games. But If I start a game and say “you guys hear about a newly discovered system of caves under the city rumored to have monsters and treasures” and the players say “Naw, we’d rather go out in the woods and explore unmarked hexes” then I am probably already running a shit campaign that the players have no respect for anyway.

I think my current players want some freedom to do some things in-character that they want to do, but as far as the main adventure I think they want some fairly well defined goals. Go visit that dungeon, go explore this abandoned tower, go find that enemy who left us for dead.

Like right now I'm doing a 1st ed. campaign set in the Night Below. Pretty linear, right? But a couple of games ago a (rolled encounter) Minotaur hunting group appeared out of a side tunnel and eventually got defeated. Appearing to come from a larger group (they weren't bearing lots of supplies or water), the players decided to go down the side tunnels and look into it. The party druid changed into a bat and swooped down many miles of tunnels where I had to randomize everything, including a small minotaur fishing village and a minotaur giant maze city (something I had been thinking about for a while, and got the chance here to display it) that the players found mighty cool and unexpected (sadly, they decided to leave that place for their currents tasks at hand, maybe to return and explore more one day).

But players deciding to "got north instead of south to the dungeon" is great in small quantities, but I would get tired of that sooner or later no matter how creative I am. It's more fun for me if the players can decide on a solid goal and follow through with it, instead of going in the opposite direction from what I've prepared or burning down inns on a whim or whatever.

If I create a dungeon I want the players to go to it, not go in the opposite direction. I can handle it if they do, but they can think a little bit about my fun too. I'm a DM, not a damn civil servant.

Those old City state sessions from my teens were the most open and free games I ever ran, and the experience and challenge made me a decent and capable GM later in life. Generally, I think it is great to have some choices, but also for the DM to light a fire here and there to temp the players into certain actions. The best games are a combo of choice and available plot hooks. Sure, I could just tell players to go wander willy nilly and crack open the Old School Encounter reference and randomize every little thing. Hex by hex wilderness crawl or whatever. But I think most players want a GM to have certain plans for them (and those plans are at their best when they come in the form of the DM being inspired by the characters), while leaving some wiggle room for improv adventure.

The party knows about an old haunted tower outside of town that perks up their interest. But the party thieves want to go do a bit of pick pocketing at the market place while the rest of the party hits up the beer tent to buy some rounds for locals and maybe hear some rumors about the tower. That's cool. Sandboxy enough for me.

Call of Cthulhu Fridays: Time Periods

Happy 120th birthday HPL! You sick bastiche.

It has been around 10 years since my last Call of Cthulhu game, and now that my group seems to be getting more open to lots of non-D&D alternatives to our regular game, I figure next year might be a good time to introduce it to some CoC . My long time player Terry is the only one of them with any experience with the game, and she loved it. She actually had a character survive at least two campaigns with her sanity mostly intact (by staying in the background and hiring a gangster bodyguard).

But should I do it in the 20’s again? I’ve had a couple of long running CoC campaigns, and they have both taken place between 1919 and 1922. One I set in the Los Angeles area, and the other shorter campaign in and around Arkham.

Victorian England is temping, and there are sourcebooks available for that setting. And I work a couple weekends of a Charles Dickens Christmas Faire up in San Francisco during the holidays, so plenty of inspiration there (the White Chapel district that they set up inside the Cow Palace is just dark and creepy). Switch that era to the Old West, and you have a setting I would love to do CoC for. Last week I got my hands on a copy of Deadlands, and that is inspiring an old west thing even more.

American Revolution seems like untouched and fertile ground for a few games. Or how about the Elizabethan Renaissance (my Ren Faire experience should really pay off for that)?

Hell, I think CoC with some Cro-Magnon Man tribesmen might even be worth a whirl.

Oh man. If only there was time for them all.