Superman, Fantastic Four, Etc. movie thoughts.

 

Having grown up a comic book wonk I always have thoughts on what is going on with comic book movies, especially these upcoming ones. When I was a lot younger comic book movies seemed designed to break a fans heart. The 1970's Superman was a stand out, and of course the Tim Burtons first Batman gave us a serious take. Though not perfect. Batman not being able to move his head but still win in a fight was the least of its issues. To me Batman Returns was a quick downturn. It was OK to me at the time, But I for sure did not like a Penguin that staggers around the sewer in long underwear that has a 3 foot shit stain up the back. There was nothing about the character that would suggest a strength or charisma that would get well dressed poodle trainers and circus clowns to be happy living in a sewer. OK, it's a comic book. But looking back on it now in modern day it seems like some kind of gritty emo transgender Cirque Du Soliel. 

Batman Forever had its good points. But I could feel things heading in a spiral. I liked Kilmers Bats, and Jim Carrey was the usual tour de farce playing the Riddler, one that seemed very much like my favorite Riddler Frank Gorshin. But the neon Tokyo themed Gotham kind of confused me. Was this set in Hong Kong or the future? A Robin who was pushing 30 years old? Ugh. A Two Face whose aging actor seemed to be trying to emulate The Joker, and probably a dose of desperately trying to compete with the zany Carrey. But what the hell it was fun and cool to look at. 

Later Batman and Robin brought back the full heartbreak. If only they had based things, Mr. Freeze, Bane, and Poison Ivy on the 90's animated series, along with a bit more serious tone, and it could really have been great. But geez, the suck.

Snipes Blade and Raimi's Spider Man got us back on track with good stuff. Though their part 3's were dog shit. 

Then with the Robert Downey Iron Man we got a new age. A character not well known to normies, we comic fans loved the character and loved the movie. So the Marvel Cinematic Universe went into full swing. It was great, but after about a decade it had its issues IMO. Iron Man 3, with its fake out Mandarin, was mostly forgettable. And the final stages of Avengers was problematic. The "snap" of Thanos, taking out half of humanity, just made things very awkward. A world where half the planet was wiped out but came back after 5 years? In following films this should have been front and center. What happens when half the world comes back and their lives are mostly gone? Who lives in their houses? Just the squatter issues would be front page news for a decade. But it hardly gets brought up. 

Then the Woke Disneyfication. Man oh man. Trying to make a plank of wood actress, Brie Larsen, the new face of the franchises was complete dog shit. It began the age of the Marvel girl boss. Whereas classic characters who had to go through hell on their journey, the new ones barely had to strive. A great real life analogy is how for the godawful Thor Love and Thunder, Chris Hemsworth had to be in the gym everyday for 6 hours to prepare, while new female Thor Natalie Portman god muscles through special effects. The new Miss Marvel, the Indian stretchy girl, literally got her powers in the mail. 

The TV shows were mostly awful, especially compared to the Netflix series from a few years back like Daredevil. She Hulk, a character I collected back in the day, and shows like Echo, were just identity politics bullshit. Just like Disney Star Wars, the Marvel shit started bombing. And man, all the hyuka hyuka constant snarky joking around, as if left behind as a curse by Downey's Tony Snark. They lost their legacy fans in pursuit of a Rainbow Coalition audience that didn't really exist for it outside of online forums.

When the shit failed, they cried "racism" and "misogynist" and blamed white males, even though they themselves did not go out and plunk down the cash to see the stuff. 

I'm not going to count the new Captain America movie as part of the upcoming items this year. It's out now and not doing so good. This movie is a couple years late, and its budget doubled from endless reshoots. It may do better than its original versions, where I understand it was going to be yet another Donald Trump analogy that so much product, such as Amazons The Boys, where indulging in. But after seeing that half the country at least supports the new prez, they switched that analogy out a bit I understand. Was Red Hulk going to originally be Orange Hulk? 

OK, this Cap is probably going to be a popcorn fart, but what about the upcoming stuff? This is for both Marvel and DC; both of them having fallen from grace to a large degree. I actually like Batman v. Superman, and loved the Snyder cut, but by the awful Wonder Woman 1984 things went off a cliff for DC. So what about...Superman...?

Superman Legacy - I love Guardians of the Galaxy, and Peacemaker and the second Suicide Squad were pretty good. But James Gunn for Superman? I dunno. I like what I see in the trailers. Krypto the Supergod is a big gamble, a dog with a cape and all. But I love it. It seems like it is going to be a big nod to Golden Age supes. And it being an ensemble, with Guy Gardner, Hawkgirl, Metamorpho, etc may also be a gamble. But with the other heroes being kind of corporate and working for Maxwell Lord, such as in the old Justice League international comics, I think this is going to have some kind of juxtaposition between the selfless Superman and other heroes who are in it for the money. I am very hopeful for this.

Fantastic Four - also hopeful. I dunno about the casting. I am getting sick of Pedro Pascal, and don't know that he is a good Reed Richards. Especially with the mustache. The fucking stache better not stretch. Johnny Storm looks nothing special, and Ben Grimm...I dunno. but its the ages that bother me. The Actress playing Susan Storm is pushing 40, and Pedro is like 50. Reed should be at leat 10 years older than trophy wife Sue, but she should be no older than 25. The actress is lovely and all, and looks a lot younger, so maybe it will be ok. What I do like is the retro 60's setting. It for sure reflects early FF, where it's the 60's but interstellar travel, time machines, flying cars etc exist. My guess is this is happening because the FF have not appeared in previous films, and maybe Galactus will destroy that setting and they will come to the modern MCU. That might be awkward though.. Also, I guess this is where Doctor Doom will appear. 

Doomsday and beyond - so Robert Downey jr. is Doc Doom. Speculation has it that this will be an evil version of Tony Stark, perhaps adopted by the Von Dooms. Whatevs. I just hope he is not a snarky jokey Doom. Chris Evans is set to return as well, maybe as an evil Cap America. 

Everything will be leading up I think to an entirely new Marvel Universe after Secret Wars. A reset with new actors for all the top gun characters. But it is all kind of down the road though. I'm not super excited for Superhero shit anymore. Much like I hardly ever pick up a comic these days. Great, good, or bad, I won't be waiting with bated breath anymore. Like a lot of people, I go back to older stuff rather than buy new product and consume more new product. Old shows, old movies. 

Much like my mild wrestling fandom, I like the real life behind the scenes stuff more than the filmed product. Personality clashes, and big stars acting like divas. I guess you could say I do have a mild interest, but I really don't think I will every actually be eager to see whatever the finished product is. What they are doing with it, and its potential failures and losses, are kind of more interesting to me to eventually see. YMMV.

Cheers

Isle of Dread - gotta do the Giant Crab

 After around 10 games in the city and around 3 on the boat ride, the party is on the Isle of Dread. 

The first time I used the module as is was when I was a teen. A long time ago. Since then about 120 years of character continuity has gone by, and things change. Not the island, really. I have had adventures there several times over the years. Maybe a couple or three with expeditions to the plateau. 

But the villages have had some changes. For a couple of decades in game time there was the Pagos Trading Company that had a trading post on the beach near Tanaroa and the great wall. It was mostly run by characters over a couple of campaigns long ago. But it went out of business eventually. But the trading post remains, run and pretty much owned now by old Pagos employee Trader Tim. Tim has lived there for over 20 years, and is a friend to the tribes. He helps with trade negotiations and even keeps the tiki bar going. He can even provide fairly comfy accommodations in some huts on site. There is even a hot tub!

But the big fun of last night's session was emulating one of my favorite scenes from the old Mysterious Island movie I have loved since childhood.

I think the last time I did the Isle, it was giant crabs but the size of Shetland ponies. But I wanted to do this big one. It was chasing some village girls when the party came across them. 

I gave it 18 AC and 60 hit points. The characters are 4th level now, and they hit it hard with magic and stuff. The AC helped keep it around awhile, but web and damage spells made fairly short work of it. But the characters had fun with it. We ended the session with a hot tub party, and the grateful native girls showing up with a nice big pot of crab bisk!

The fun on the Isle has only just begun.

Cheers